Like most people outside of Nostradamus and Nate Silver, I’m no good at this entire predictions thing if my 2012 column is any indication.

However this gained’t stop this man for providing just a few up…all in the title of entertainment. So without additional ado, let’s explore what’s going to absolutely, positively occur in 2014:

Because of the albatross that is Obamacare (skyrocketing deductibles, skyrocketing premiums, increasing opposition), Republicans easily preserve the House.

Republicans will barely take again the Senate (See: Care, Obama).

Once more, in case you’re a Democrat or simply any individual who loathes the GOP, these predictions will have to be embraced in keeping with the earlier file of the creator.

Ronan Farrow—who has been guaranteed a website hosting role on MSNBC—will be added as a co-host of The Cycle on a rotation basis (similar to its thought, Fox’s The Five).

Twitter’s stock price breaks a hundred (presently at $66/share).

Auburn will shock Florida State (at present large favorites) to win school soccer’s National Championship. Don’t mess with karma.

Duck Dynasty sees a ratings explosion for its new season beginning on January 15th. a Part of A&E’s “suspension” includes nine new (already-taped) episodes that includes the controversial Phil Robertson, who apparently received his name in the paper once or twice lately. A&E—which makes $four hundred million in Duck merchandise alone—signs the Robertsons (all 20 of them) to a rewarding new contract.

Justine Sacco—the now-former PR exec fired for this tweet heard ‘spherical the world—lands on a truth express somewhere. Famous person Apprentice, any individual?

Paula Deen begins comeback– launches a new software on a cable network within the 2nd half of of the 12 months. Co-host contains an African-American chef (name it the Howard Stern/Robin Quivers approach, but in reverse).

Tiger Woods wins an enormous for the first time in six years.

American Hustle wins Highest Image. Matthew McConaughey—a long way from Failure to Launch—wins Very Best Actor (Dallas Patrons Membership). Cate Blanchett takes Very Best Actress for Blue Jasmine (OK, these bets are extra from a rooting side).

Jay Leno replaces Piers Morgan on CNN at 9:00 PM.

Jimmy Kimmel wins Spherical 1 of the new late evening wars over Jimmy Fallon.

Bill O’Reilly lands again on New York Instances bestseller listing with a new book. Title includes the phrase “Killing” in it.

The chilly weather Super Bowl is a slightly boring, low-scoring affair (I grew up 15 minutes from the Meadowlands in Jersey, so recognize this: Wind will make throwing the ball an adventure), with the Seahawks beating the Bengals, 17-7.

David Gregory is changed by means of Chuck Todd on Meet the Press.

The Washington Redskins keep the Washington Redskins.

George Zimmerman will get arrested again…cements reliable O.J. 2.0 status.

Edward Snowden does now not return to the US, because…why would he?

My Chicago Cubs is not going to win the World Sequence. Yup, we’re heading into daring territory now…

Toronto Mayor Rob Ford wins reelection in October.

Blackberry is administered remaining rights.

Hillary Clinton declares completely nothing relating to her future plans (nor should she).

Chris Christie sheds every other 30 kilos, bringing his stated loss complete to 100. Fat jokes proceed regardless.

At least every 7-12 days, a public figure (famous person, athlete, journalist, flesh presser) will tweet out one thing that forces a groveling apology, resignation or firing (or an apology that also ends up in one of the crucial two).

On December 31, 2014, a complete evaluate displays as a minimum 82 percent of the aforementioned predictions don’t come to fruition…author vows to do any other one for 2015 anyway.

Chuffed New 12 months!

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>>Apply Joe Concha on Twitter @ConchaMedia